THE GENERAL (Clubflat nickname, founded in 2006)


Real Name: Matt L


Position: Clubflat Army Fitness General



One of the very original members of Clubflat is 'The General'. It was back in the early prime evil dark ages, when Quick Buck and The General were introduced over the sale of a 'dodgy' car amp. Their friendship grew, and it was during the mid 90's that the infamous "Flat" was put to best use by the duo. The General was wild back in the day. There were times you couldn't pry that whiskey bottle out of his hand for love nor money. But although he liked the odd tipple, there was, and always will be one primary focus on his mind. FITNESS! The lad doesn't know when to stop. Since he was young enough to have some sort of muscle, The General has been abusing them by lifting weights heavier than himself, playing squash, rigorous mountain biking, running and even surfing. His aim, as The General, always seems to be to want to injure other people by making them exercise to the point where their body gives up, yet to him it is as if he was simply taking the dog for a walk. The joy on The General's face is almost sickening when every few weeks the Clubflat Team hear of how he has put some poor sportsman wannabe into a hospital bed. His fanatical extremism approach to exercise is how his nickname arrived during a surfing holiday to Fuerteventura in March 2006. Every morning The General would be up stupidly early and whilst the rest were recovering from hangovers, he was bellowing orders to us in true army style to get our "Lazy asses out of bed", shortly followed by "GET THE F*CK UP!" He didn't want us lowly maggots to be the reason for him missing a good surfing session! When not recruiting, or injuring people though, The General sure knows how to enjoy himself. He still likes the odd drink, gamble and has been known to visit some "Clubs" that the normal partygoer wouldn't dream of attending in a bid to kill some of that testosterone. He might be strict with his own fitness regime, but everyone needs to unwind, especially after a hard days downhill biking or tournament level squash activity. The General really is a top quality member of Clubflat and brings laughs and entertainment with him all the way. For your own safety though, do NOT challenge him.


The General says: "If I have to tell you one more time, I'm gonna kick your pitiful excuse for a body into next week".


Claim to Fame: "There are not enough days in the week to visit the people I've put in hospital through squash and biking ".


Other Aliases:

General Meathead - The full version of The General's nickname. Founded in Fuerteventura 2006.

Fitness First - The Generals original Clubflat nickname, taken after the commercial gym chain of the same name. Nickname founded in Budapest 2005.