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Crazy Nick, the owner of Cotehele Lodge owns a speedboat.  So for the price of just some petrol, Clubflat decided to see just how crazy he was.  Nick had a number of water activities to demonstrate his recklessness with, including the rubber rings, a water board, and just plain old going as fast as he bloody well could across the waves.  Only Quick Buck, Hero and Memphis had eaten their Weetabix that day and dared brave the boat.  Nick warmed us up with a white knuckle ride blasting across the harbour and beach fronts.  The sea wasn't particularly rough that day but he was going so fast it felt like the boat was hitting tsunami after tsunami.  Ducking down and gripping extremely tightly was the only way to avoid being bounced out the boat after you launched off wave after wave.  That was fun, what's next?  Shouldn't have asked.  Nick inflated and attached the rubber ring on a rope to the back of the boat.  "It holds 3" Nick said looking devishly at us.  Then he announced he only had 2 life jackets and one of those was a child's size.  Memphis grabbed the large jacket, while Quick Buck hilariously squashed into a child's jacket that wouldn't fit round him to zip up.  Hero thought about it, then declined the 3rd place in the ring.  Nick tried to persuade him by telling him some great stories of how he had sunk his previous boat and on another occasion how someone being pulled by the ring got thrown out, knocked unconscious and lost a tooth as he hit the water.  "But that was in my old boat" said Nick.  "I've never managed to flip this ring yet, not even in big swells".  Yet! Yet!  Those famous last words.  Hero made his excuses saying he had to stay in the boat to take photo's.  Just as well.  Within 60 seconds Memphis was flung out the ring into the water at break neck speed.  Climbing back in, Quick Buck asked "What was it like".  Memphis' reply summed it up in one word.... "Devastating".  As he climbed back in, Nick laughed out loud "Well that's not happened before, ha ha ha".  His concern was overwhelming.  It took less than 2 minutes before this time both Memphis and Quick Buck were catastrophically flung out the ring landing 25ft apart with near spinal damage. The ring was reeled in now as Quick Buck refused to get back in it.  It was then that it was discovered the ring had a leak and was slowly deflating.  "Oh well" laughed Nick, "Should have checked that" he laughed.  Then he stuck the boat in top gear and bombed all the way back to the harbour, turning round occasionally to make sure we were still in the boat whilst laughing like a mad man.  Even Tragedy Dave would have admiration for this mad man.  Until next year Nick....

 

The bay across Newquay was Nick's own playground

The Mitchell Brothers had just dumped a body in concrete off the dock

Bodge-It's T-Shirt betrayed his thoughts of the punani behind

Aren't harbour steps a wonderful thing?

Passer-by warns the seal that Nick is getting his boat out

With the tide out, it was hoped Nick wouldn't be able to launch the boat

No such luck, he came prepared!

Nick liked the thrill of potentially getting stuck when launching the boat

A deranged Quick Buck was taking his boat for a walk

Crazy Nick never stopped laughing, in a real 'lost his marbles' way

As the boat angled skywards, Quick Buck screamed to get off the front

Nick laughs as Quick Buck's hair shows the results of travelling at Mach 3

Hero ducks down as the boat lands on another wave

This was as close as Memphis got to standing up on the water board

Unsuspecting the fate that was about to befall them...

So far so good - but it has only been 10 seconds

50 secs on, the ring crashed into the sea on its way back from the moon

Quick Buck decided that fishing was a much safer sport

Memphis considers whether to pay Nick back with some Bellmania

Seal was eager to get his mug shot on the Clubflat site